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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25024210">Something Borrowed</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBizarreKaar/pseuds/TheBizarreKaar'>TheBizarreKaar</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Guilt, M/M, One-Sided Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto, Regret, Unrequited Love, Weddings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 07:28:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,843</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25024210</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBizarreKaar/pseuds/TheBizarreKaar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Naruto loses his nerve when the wedding day draws near. He spills the truth to one person and hopes the source of his troubles can be cured.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hatake Kakashi/Uzumaki Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>64</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. veil</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Naruto sighed as he looked out the open window of his apartment. He had barely gotten a wink of sleep and already his anxiety was through the roof. It was the dreaded day before his wedding and he was starting to have a sense of regret for things he will no longer have a chance to do. To find out for sure if this is something he wanted for the rest of his life. Another sigh came from him and he clicked his tongue annoyed at himself.</p><p>He grabbed his jacket and headed out the door. An early morning walk would clear his head on intruding thoughts. He absentmindedly walked down the silent dark streets letting his feet wander aimlessly. He wasn't surprised when they led him to Ichiraku's. Unfortunately Teuchi hadn't opened yet so he couldn't sit and enjoy a comforting bowl of ramen as he tried to ignore dark thoughts that ought not to be given any light.</p><p>He sighed wistfully up at the dawn sky, the sun just barely peeking over the mountain faces.</p><p>
  <em>'Dad...I wish I could talk to you about this. I'm sure Mom would definitely scold me.'</em>
</p><p>"Naruto? I thought that was you. What are you doing up so early?" Iruka spoke behind him carrying piles of books towards the Academy, which Naruto just noticed he was standing in front of. "Umm, mornin' Iruka-sensei..." Iruka scrutinized Naruto's moping and sullen voice, side-eying him as he moved to unlock the doors of the academy.</p><p>"Something the matter? I don't think I've seen you this depressed since..." Naruto stared at Iruka in amazement. How was it he always knew when he was upset? Naruto shook his head in denial though, to save face if anything. "I'm fine, don't worry about me. I'm just tired I guess." Which wasn't exactly a lie but Naruto didn't quite feel like spilling his secret just yet.</p><p>Iruka nodded in understanding, it wasn't unusual for the blonde to bottle things up. If he wanted to talk about it, he'd come to him in his own time. "Alright Naruto, I'll see you around then. I have to set up for my morning classes. How about some lunch on me?" Naruto perked up at the offer and smiled brightly in response. "That sounds like an awesome idea! I'll see ya!" Naruto waved goodbye and sped off to go see the hokage for a quick mission.</p><p>At least that's what he had intended. The inquiry died on his lips as his scrambled thoughts slammed to a halt and a revelation appeared before him.</p><p>He walked through the doors without knocking and before he could even open his mouth, Kakashi beat him to it. "Naruto, I'm surprised to see you up this early. I take it something is bothering you?" The second person today to notice Naruto's strange demeanor. "Umm...s-sensei. I..." But Naruto couldn't get the words to come out.</p><p>"I see. Tomorrow's a big day for you, I'd imagine you must be feeling elated. Or is it more likely that you are suddenly getting cold feet, Naruto?" Trust Kakashi to hit the nail right on the head. Naruto was silent and scratched at his cheek in shame. "Well which is it? The ceremony or the commitment?" Kakashi folded his hands under his chin in thought.</p><p>Finally Naruto answered although cryptically. "So...If someone had say, regrets about certain things, and those things happened to make them question their motive for accepting something, what should they do?"</p><p>Kakashi sighed softly and leaned onto a palm under his chin. "Maa...If I am to take what your saying under consideration, perhaps this individual should weigh his options and deal with them accordingly. But if you are asking for my expert opinion based on my assumptions...You should talk to Hinata, Naruto. I'm sure whatever is holding you back isn't going to change how she sees you."</p><p>Naruto frowned and his shoulders slumped defeatedly. "It's not Hinata I'm worried about." Kakashi lifted his eyebrow in worry at the statement. "Naruto...what is this about? Why would your view of Hinata change? It's a little too late to second guess yourself." Naruto swallowed the lump in his throat and prepared himself for the first time telling a soul of his secret.</p><p>"I-I, that is to say women don't...umm..." Kakashi got the jist of what Naruto was saying. And honestly that explained so much of his youth. "Maa, poor Hinata." Kakashi stood and walked over to his former student. "Have you talked to her about this?" He wrapped an arm around his shoulder in a comforting gesture. "N-no...you are the first and only person I have told." Kakashi's eyes widened at the confession.</p><p>He squeezed the hand on his shoulder. "I see. May I give you a piece of advice? You shouldn't ignore the bachelor party per say but, you should definitely find the time to figure things out with Hinata tonight. This is a pretty big dilemma, and an even more important decision for tomorrow."</p><p>Naruto sighed for the third time that morning. "I was actually hoping you knew someone who could help me. Maybe Tsunade can make a cure or something? I don't want to tell Hinata if I don't have to." Kakashi frowned at that bit of info. Naruto was willing to hide that part of himself? Was it shame or embarrassment causing his reasoning? Naruto shouldn't feel the need to do that.</p><p>"I may know someone. I can set something up, but it will most likely be during the late evening. That okay?" Naruto looked up with cautious but hopeful eyes. "R-really? That's great! Um thanks, Kakashi-sensei I really appreciate it." Kakashi gave him a strained smile but it was lost under his mask. "Naruto, you should really consider talking to Hinata. I think you'll find that it will take some of the burden off your shoulders. If I may ask, why did you agree to the marriage if this was a concern of yours?"</p><p>Naruto knew that the question was coming but nothing prepared him for the guilt he felt. Nor the wicked shame for deceiving someone like Hinata. "It was her clan's wishes, and she was the second person to tell me they loved me. I thought that I owed her after...everything. Everyone expected us to just..be together and I couldn't say no...I didn't know what I should do."</p><p>Kakashi sucked in a sharp breath. He didn't know that Naruto felt so <em>obligated</em> to care for the Hyuga heir. Nobody should feel pressured to love someone. Least of all Naruto. "Maa, we'll fix this Naruto. Now I know you didn't come here for a free therapy session. So why have you come here?"</p><p>Naruto glanced past Kakashi and out the window. The morning light was coming in through the blinds and the sun was just the recipe he needed to return to his happy self. "A mission! I was gonna do a few local missions in the village, just to keep myself busy." Kakashi let him go and walked back to his desk, pinching the bridge of his nose.</p><p>"Naruto, as much as I would gladly send you out to rescue Tora from the forest again, you and I both know you are still on vacation. How about I cut you a deal, help me in the tower and I'll accompany you to lunch." Kakashi thought he made a good bargain but...Naruto made a sad expression.</p><p>"Okay! Where do I start?" Naruto rolled his sleeves up his arms, hands on his hips. Kakashi chuckled at the enthusiasm and pointed towards a large pile of paperwork on his desk. "I need these papers catergorized, and then I need to archive the mission reports coming in. You sure you're up for it?"</p><p>Naruto rubbed his nose with his thumb and smirked. "You bet, it'll be good training for when I'm hokage." Kakashi smiled warmly, it seemed like Naruto got some of his groove back. "Yes, yes. Well then let's get to work then."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. portrait</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Kakashi investigates.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Maa, I've never seen this desk so sparse. Your shadow clones' help is really something Naruto." Kakashi traced a finger against the wooden grain on the desk and was unsurprised at the lack of dust.</p><p>Naruto smiled modestly and rubbed the back of his head. "Nah, don't mention it. I'm just glad to be useful at the moment. I would be sitting at home frothing at the mouth if you didn't suggest this." Kakashi chuckled lightly under his breath and ruffled Naruto's hair before making his way over to the door.</p><p>"How about Ichiraku's? A reward for a job well done." The light behind Naruto's eyes lit up like fireworks at the mention of his favorite meal and he dashed after Kakashi as he disappeared from sight. </p><p>The duo made their merry way towards the restaurant and Naruto's smile fell when he noticed Hinata was walking towards them. Sakura, Ino, and Tenten were following in tow. Kakashi kept his worried silence to himself as he discreetly observed their interaction.</p><p>"H-hello Naruto. How is your day going?" Her voice was sweet and Kakashi felt himself cringe painfully when Naruto's danced around her greeting.</p><p>"O-oh, yeah. I'm kinda hungry so I'm out for lunch with Kakashi-sensei. I'll see you later." At this point Kakashi knew public displays of affection were the normal thing to do with your significant other. A small peck on the cheek or holding hands. Perhaps even a short hug. Naruto did none of these things, and he treated her as if she were any of his other comrades. He would have to ask him about that later.</p><p>Hinata noticed as well as the others, yet nobody commented on it and the group broke awake from them as Naruto walked forward anyways in the direction of Ichiraku's. As soon as they were far enough away, Naruto's shoulders sagged and an impervious frown was plastered on his face.</p><p>"Kakashi-sensei what am I gonna do? We are getting married tomorrow and I can't even look her in the eye." Naruto scrubbed roughly at his face with both hands and sighed deeply. It seems there was more to this than meets the eye and Kakashi felt, more than heard, the regret hanging on those words.</p><p>"Well for one, you need to muster up enough courage to face your problems. And I believe you can do it Naruto. It's only a matter of time. Anyways it's nearly impossible to think on an empty stomach, so let's go."</p><p>Naruto nodded at the reassuring words and followed after his sensei. He stared blankly at the broad shoulders and focused on the kanji decorating his back. <strong><em>Rokudaime</em>.</strong> His lifetime goal was to become Hokage. Never in his life did he think finding love and getting married was ever a part of the road he was on. He still couldn't quite get over it, it was like he was living someone else's dream, and not his own.</p><p>Kakashi wasn't used to a silent and brooding Naruto. He peered over his shoulder, to find Naruto intensely fixated on the back of his uniform. Naruto wasn't the kind of shinobi who dwelled on his troubles. He liked to be loud, as if shouting at the sky would erase all of his problems. The situation he found himself in wasn't all that simple however.</p><p>Soon they were ducking under Ichiraku's noren and Naruto was brought out of his dark thoughts when Iruka turned and greeted them. Naruto shoved his thoughts into the corner and smiled brightly at Iruka and took his seat on the stool next to him, Kakashi making himself comfortable towards to other side of the counter so he may observe Naruto more.</p><p>He had a dilemma of his own after all. He had a difficult choice to make. Either concede to Naruto's request and obtain some type of medication or medical jutsu that could help him. Or deny him and shackle him to a life that would cause him nothing but heartbreak and pain. Neither were great choices but...perhaps there was a third option. It was a little unorthodox, but sometimes fate likes to throw meteor sized rocks on the road of life.</p><p>He kept his idea to himself, the nature of it would probably come across the wrong way. He ate his ramen in contemplative silence, nothing out of the norm and finished with record speed. Naruto was eating more than his normal share and if he didn't do something Iruka might end up being bought out of house and home.</p><p>"So, Naruto, what are you plans for the rest of the day? Are you still willing to help at the tower after this?" Kakashi leaned his chin casually onto his palm, watching Naruto for any clues. Said blonde tilted his head to the side, thinking, and nodded afterwards. "You bet! If I have to sit through any more of those clan recitals I'll claw my eyes out."</p><p>Iruka glared at the back of Naruto's head, and if Kakashi remembered correctly, Konohamaru might have filmed him saying something sternly about Naruto behaving like a proper gentleman. Kakashi couldn't blame either of them to be honest. Yet Naruto seemed to have bit off more than he could chew.</p><p>"Now that's not nice. You should treat your in-laws with respect young man. I didn't raise you to act like that. You should learn the Hyuga clan's traditions, as they will be yours starting tomorrow." Iruka mouthed off sternly, momentarily forgetting about his bowl of half-eaten ramen. He pointed and gestured with his chopsticks, causing Naruto to wince and evade them at every movement.</p><p>Naruto huffed, annoyed and for once got up leaving his bowl half eaten. Iruka stopped talking in shock and stared at him in a new light.</p><p>"Naruto?" Iruka glanced between Kakashi's narrowed eyes glinting with something calculating, and Naruto's too stretched grin. Something wasn't right. "<em>It's fine.</em>" Naruto bit out. Everything about him was tense. His form stiff and his jaw clenched. "Thank you for the meal." Naruto stormed out of the restaurant and left a bewildered Iruka behind. "Kakashi..." Iruka finally spoke, he turned from the noren and found him staring sadly after Naruto. "I know. Don't worry too much, he'll be fine."</p><p>Kakashi placed money on the counter and left to go after Naruto before he disappeared altogether. Surprisingly Naruto was waiting for him a couple buildings down and Kakashi sighed heavily before he wrapped a strong arm around Naruto's shoulders so couldn't run away. "Do you want to talk? Or are you going to try and ignore this until it's too late?"</p><p>Naruto pinched his face together briefly but it was gone in a flash. "I'd rather not. Beside don't we have more important things to worry about." He said as if Kakashi was going to just drop the subject altogether. "Well, considering you singlehandedly cleared my desk of the more urgent paperwork, I'd say we have more than enough time on our hands to have a little chat."</p><p>"It's not like you're giving me much of a choice." He looked at Kakashi confused, when Kakashi turned them back around to walk in the opposite direction of the tower, past Ichiraku's once more. "Uh, Kakashi-sensei? Where are we going?" Kakashi just smiled warmly at him, and Naruto felt his confusion worsen.</p><p>"Really? One would think you'd know the route to your own home Naruto." Kakashi said as he looked up at a familiar window. He built up some chakra to the soles of his feet and propelled them upwards to land on the jutting ledge. Naruto scrunched his face up, but opened his balcony window nonetheless.</p><p>"So why are we here? I thought you needed more help at the tower?" Naruto scratched at his cheek and sat on the edge of his bed watching Kakashi survey the surrounding space. The hokage smiled softly at the team photo at his bedside. He held off on answering Naruto's question until he picked up the frame.</p><p>"Let's talk. Earlier you didn't greet Hinata properly, why?" Naruto rubbed the back of his neck in absent guilt. "Did I? I guess I didn't know what to say. Or act. Should I have done something differently?" Naruto looked up at Kakashi from his seated position and Kakashi sighed. "Maa...I suppose it doesn't matter now. Although I did notice you aren't very affectionate with her either. Does this stem from your predicament?"</p><p>Naruto nodded cautiously, wondering where the conversation was leading. "I thought as much. Why don't we try to pinpoint the cause. When you were an academy student and a genin, you were very vocal about a crush on a certain team member. Does it have anything to do with that?" Naruto shook his head. "Hmm."</p><p>"What about your infamous jutsu? Could it be you were mislead by the types of women you've encountered?" Naruto hesitated, unsure if he should nod or shake his head. Because wasn't that two seperate things? Kakashi though was starting to form a theory in his head because he remembered something that happened during the Team Assignment day back in the academy.</p><p>"Do you remember our first C-rank mission?" Naruto nodded his head and Kakashi continued. "What did you think of Haku when you first met him?" Kakashi watched curiously when Naruto's face morphed into several emotions ranging from embarrassment to shy attraction to land on frigid blankness. "<em>Weelllll</em>...I thought Haku was a girl when I first met him. He was the one who told me that protecting your precious people is what makes you strong."</p><p>Kakashi's eyes widened in surprise. He knew that Naruto's had a protective steak the size of the universe, yet he didn't think Haku, an unfortunate enemy at the time, was the one who instilled those words into him. It was an extension of Obito's words, a nindo that perfectly suited someone with a heart of gold like Naruto.</p><p>"I see. Was finding out that Haku wasn't actually a girl traumatic for you?" Naruto's head shot up and stared wildly at Kakashi in shock. His silence was all Kakashi needed to know. "Maa forgive me. I'm just trying to understand the 'why' of your current situation here, Naruto. I tend to overstep sometimes." Kakashi eye smiled to hide the tension in his shoulders, sometimes he forgets to filter out some of his thoughts.</p><p>Naruto shook his head, letting Kakashi know that an apology wasn't needed. "I wasn't aware something like that would cause me problems. How did you even know?" Naruto asked quietly, barely a whisper under his breath. To the point where Kakashi thought he had imagined it.</p><p>"Everything has a play in your life Naruto. Whether you notice it or not. Such as someone stealing your first kiss or confessing to you during the middle of a war. Not to mention your three year long trip around the five great nations with Jiraiya. And your unique transformation technique. You were bound to get confused by those kinds of things."</p><p>"You knew about that?" Naruto's face went blistering red when he heard him mention the stolen kiss.  Kakashi looked over at him in mild surprise but then remembered Naruto didn't actually know about that incident. Almost every jounin captain at the time had witnessed the act thanks to the Third's crystal ball.</p><p>"Mmm. I know almost everything about you. Things you might not even be aware about. I also know almost all there is to know about the other members of our team. Including Sai and Yamato of course." Kakashi sat next to Naruto on the bed and fell backwards to lean on his arms. He kept his gaze neutral, yet focused on Naruto's many changing features.</p><p>Naruto picked at the fabric of his pants and kept his red face down before he shyly speaking, his voice mumbled again. "I didn't hate it as much as I acted like I did." Kakashi took the information in and suddenly the experimental treatment he had stumbled on earlier didn't seem too alien. Perhaps Naruto would be willing to try it.</p><p>"Not to put you on the spot or anything but...can you try to tell me why?" Naruto choked on nothing and gaped a few times trying to clear his airways. "Uhh...I dunno, it was just nice I guess. The only other times I've been kissed is by granny or when someone was trying to steal my body." Naruto frowned and tried not to let himself get too depressed. At least not more than he was feeling at the moment.</p><p>"Ahh. Well good news, the reason for your problem is quite simple Naruto. The solution however...will be much trickier. We will have to finesse our way through the trauma you've experienced before we find it." Kakashi reached a hand over to ruffle his hair, partially because it had become second nature to him, and also because he realized Naruto was touch starved. And had been for a very long time.</p><p>"Really?! What's wrong with me, Kakashi-sensei!?" Naruto looked cautiously hopeful, but kept himself from being too eager. "Don't take this the wrong way, Naruto. You are the most bravest individual I have ever met. Yet to put it bluntly you are scared of intimacy. But don't worry, I'll find somone to help you."</p><p>Naruto's arm shot out to grasp at Kakashi when he went to stand up from the bed. Kakashi could see pure fear in his eyes. "No, <em>please! </em>I don't want just anybody knowing about this. They'll think less of me and I'll become the laughing stock of the village or <em>or</em>..." He was reaching for an excuse. Anything to keep his secret. And Kakashi could see the stricken panic from a mile away.</p><p>"Naruto...who would you want to trust with this? Iruka? Tsunade?...<em>Hinata?</em>" Kakashi sighed when Naruto shook his head at every name mentioned. "Just you. Nobody else." Kakashi gave Naruto an incredulous look and crossed his arms impatiently.</p><p>"You need to work with me here. I'm trying my best to help you given the...circumstances. I have an idea of something we can try but I need to settle some things beforehand. Have you heard of exposure therapy before?" Naruto shook his head signalling that no he hadn't.</p><p>"Hmm that might pose an issue in the long run. I'll explain in detail later, but for now I want you to leave everything to me. Naruto, are you positive you don't want to include Hinata in this? Her presence might help." Naruto shook his head adamantly. This was his problem, he didn't want to drag Hinata into it.</p><p>"I see. I'll be on my way then and I'll have one of my summons fetch you after everything has been taken care of. Please try not to do anything unnecessary in the mean time." Kakashi waved to him and leapt out the window.</p><p>Naruto could only try and pass the time before he lost his nerve completely.</p>
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